She often liked to wonder about the ramifications of certain random and absurd courses of action that one could only term as the eccentricities of the technologically smart and socially challenged. She looked at the irate man standing opposite her, whose hands were placed upon his hips, his whole demeanour threatening physical violence. She had to speak and speak fast, before the crowd gathered and yikes, there they were. People passing by were already starting to pause and stare at the three of them. Surely, they must have presented an odd picture.
Speak Mel, speak fast, she thought. And yet, as she opened her mouth, her throat dried up and words didn’t come. Drops of perspiration ran down her face as the man started tapping his feet impatiently, glaring at her.
“Well, we don’t have all day, girl!” he growled and she knew without a doubt he was the meanest human being she’d ever met.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know he was not single! Why isn’t he wearing a ring or … I don’t know at least sending out the I’m taken vibe?” she yelled finally, partially apologetic and partially annoyed. She was the victim here after all.
“So you go around randomly asking people on the street whom you think are single to be your boyfriend?” the other man asked, one eye seemingly popping out of its socket in surprise. He was one to ask – what business had he had, checking her out when he was gay? If he hadn’t she might never have gotten into this mess. Oh God, he’s gay, thought Mel. He was probably realizing that her bag was Gucci or something. And that made her want to punch something. Herself, preferably.
“I was not asking him to be my boyfriend. I was asking him to be my date at a networking event.” she said teeth gritted. Realizing that any shred of dignity she had left could only be rescued by a speedy departure, she put both her hands together in a respectful gesture and said with the fakest smile she had donned till date, “Please forgive me, I must go now.” With that she turned on her heel and strode away rapidly. With each step came the growing realization that her dissolving into the ground or nothingness itself, much preferred though it might be – was just not going to happen. The first thing she would do when she got home would be to chuck that self-help book in the trash can.
What was she thinking? Do any one thing that scares you the most. There you go. It had been on her bucketlist ever since she’d read that romcom novel – ask a random stranger out. She’d been apprehensive of this one and had wondered what would happen if she actually did it. Now she knew. She realized she might have been better off wondering instead.
Disclaimer: Thankfully, this has never happened to me or anyone that I know of. But I’ve always wanted to write a romcom just once with a different ending than a simple HEA.
This story is the brainchild of my imagination and wanderings into the non-existent realms of reality. (Riddle me this!)